Yesterday was Halloween and true to form, my family went with a theme. Surely you can tell from the blog title just what that theme was, right? My boys went as characters from Ghostbusters. Boogie was the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, Will was a Ghostbuster and Brad was Slimer! It was Boogie's idea but oh my goodness did the entire neighborhood seem to love it! Everywhere we went people pointed the boys out and would say things like, "the cutest thing ever" or "best costumes of the night" and it completely made me grin. It made the boys pretty happy too!
I guess now I have to set my mind toward another theme with three possibilities for boys...
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
The end of an era!
We have reached the end of an era. In just 4 hours I will wake up to prepare to go in for my fourth c-section. In just a couple hours more than that Will will cease to be the baby of the family. I will suddenly be the mother to 4 children instead of 3.
Sometime tomorrow morning, Brad will finally be in my arms instead of my womb. It seems odd to say that the time has come. It seems like we should have more time, and yet it seems like I have been pregnant forever! Each child begins a new chapter in my life, a new bit of story to grow right along with him. And so, we have reached the end and the beginning at the same time. Welcome precious Brad, I can't wait to live your story with you!
Sometime tomorrow morning, Brad will finally be in my arms instead of my womb. It seems odd to say that the time has come. It seems like we should have more time, and yet it seems like I have been pregnant forever! Each child begins a new chapter in my life, a new bit of story to grow right along with him. And so, we have reached the end and the beginning at the same time. Welcome precious Brad, I can't wait to live your story with you!
Friday, October 19, 2012
The little moments matter
Today was not an exceptionally good day. I don't feel like I accomplished anything on my list. Boogie was still a bit under the weather. Hubby had so much work to do. When we tried to go out as a family Will's diaper failed. It just wasn't a very good day. Defeated, we trudged upstairs to put the boys to bed. When we entered their room, ahh the disappointment. It was a mess. As a group we began straightening up, everyone a bit sad to have to include that in the bedtime routine. And then things just changed.
Will was little wound up. He started backing up across the room, getting a running start and then throwing himself into my arms. Next he did that to Hubby and finally to Boogie. Hubby sought to calm him down by pretending to sleep on the floor. Little did he know that whenever Will and I catch Boogie asleep we pretend he's a sleeping prince who needs love to wake up. Of course, Will immediately thought that was the game his daddy was playing and began hugging and kissing him. By the time Hubby got up Will had decided he would make a nice horse. Next Will wanted me to bounce him while Boogie and Hubby interacted. Eventually I insisted the kids make their way to the beds. Just before they climbed in Will decided to hand out some more hugs and kisses. I snatched him up and said, "Where's the best place for kisses?" and began to call out places and kiss him. On the foot, on the hand, on the shoulder, on the head, on the knee, on the ear, on the belly, on the nose, on the elbow, on the cheek, on the mouth. I tried to give him a hug then but he was too busy pushing me away as he shouted out, "No, on the brother!" He ran to Boogie, hugged him tight around the neck and gave him a kiss. We all laughed and threw out our arms. Will started running from one person to the next with big hugs and sweet kisses.
As our spontaneous little playtime came to a close I realized I was starting to tear up. Obviously my pregnancy hormones were getting the better of me, but I think most people would be tempted to cry too. Really, it hadn't been a great day but somehow that little bit of happiness and togetherness was the only thing that mattered about the day. It wasn't a planned event, a big activity or a wrapped present but it was one of those little moments that will always matter to me. The little moments really do matter, they are what family is made of!
Will was little wound up. He started backing up across the room, getting a running start and then throwing himself into my arms. Next he did that to Hubby and finally to Boogie. Hubby sought to calm him down by pretending to sleep on the floor. Little did he know that whenever Will and I catch Boogie asleep we pretend he's a sleeping prince who needs love to wake up. Of course, Will immediately thought that was the game his daddy was playing and began hugging and kissing him. By the time Hubby got up Will had decided he would make a nice horse. Next Will wanted me to bounce him while Boogie and Hubby interacted. Eventually I insisted the kids make their way to the beds. Just before they climbed in Will decided to hand out some more hugs and kisses. I snatched him up and said, "Where's the best place for kisses?" and began to call out places and kiss him. On the foot, on the hand, on the shoulder, on the head, on the knee, on the ear, on the belly, on the nose, on the elbow, on the cheek, on the mouth. I tried to give him a hug then but he was too busy pushing me away as he shouted out, "No, on the brother!" He ran to Boogie, hugged him tight around the neck and gave him a kiss. We all laughed and threw out our arms. Will started running from one person to the next with big hugs and sweet kisses.
As our spontaneous little playtime came to a close I realized I was starting to tear up. Obviously my pregnancy hormones were getting the better of me, but I think most people would be tempted to cry too. Really, it hadn't been a great day but somehow that little bit of happiness and togetherness was the only thing that mattered about the day. It wasn't a planned event, a big activity or a wrapped present but it was one of those little moments that will always matter to me. The little moments really do matter, they are what family is made of!
Thursday, October 18, 2012
2 checkups in 2 days
A few days ago Will turned 18 months old. That, of course, means the time has come for his 18 month check up and his first dental appointment. Amazingly, he had both of them this week! Monday was his first trip to the dentist and today was his check-up.
Monday went amazingly well. I expected him to cry and scream. I mean, who likes the dentist? Not at all the case! All the hygienist had to do was show him the toothbrush and he opened his mouth for her just like he does for me everyday for brushing! I was so impressed. Really the only thing he didn't seem to like very much was the fluoride treatment. Even then he only whimpered about it for a second. The entire staff seemed to agree that it was the best dental visit they have ever seen for a guy so young!
Will was in a completely different mood today. He cried the minute we got into the room. He didn't want to be weighed or measured at all. He didn't scream bloody murder or anything, he just kept crying and giving me sad eyes. He apparently remembers that that is where he gets shots! And, of course, he got two shots today! :( Poor little fella just couldn't catch a break! He was a good boy about them and the doctor was happy with his development so I can't complain at all. It was just sad. When we got in the van he said to me, "Momma, it hurts!" Hopefully the soreness will be gone by the morning!
Monday went amazingly well. I expected him to cry and scream. I mean, who likes the dentist? Not at all the case! All the hygienist had to do was show him the toothbrush and he opened his mouth for her just like he does for me everyday for brushing! I was so impressed. Really the only thing he didn't seem to like very much was the fluoride treatment. Even then he only whimpered about it for a second. The entire staff seemed to agree that it was the best dental visit they have ever seen for a guy so young!
Will was in a completely different mood today. He cried the minute we got into the room. He didn't want to be weighed or measured at all. He didn't scream bloody murder or anything, he just kept crying and giving me sad eyes. He apparently remembers that that is where he gets shots! And, of course, he got two shots today! :( Poor little fella just couldn't catch a break! He was a good boy about them and the doctor was happy with his development so I can't complain at all. It was just sad. When we got in the van he said to me, "Momma, it hurts!" Hopefully the soreness will be gone by the morning!
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
On the hunt
Anyone that knows me well at all can tell you that I am a list girl. I make to do lists for everything! Of course, that means that I have a list (or three) of things to get done before this baby comes. Most things on my to do lists I can assign a time frame. You know how it goes- install baby gate: 30 minutes, reorganize pantry: 2 hrs, Clean out freezer: 1 hr, Choose going home outfit: Oh my goodness, who knows!
Yep, choosing an outfit for my newest baby to go home in has been quite a challenge. I am willing to reuse most anything from one baby to the next but the going home outfit is the exception. I feel like each baby deserves to face the big, bad world for the first time in something chosen just for them! It has always been a big deal to me, ever since I didn't get to choose my daughter's going home outfit. Her birth was early and far from home and so I didn't have anything with me. Luckily, my Aunt Connie had made the hellish drive down just to be there for us and she went shopping for me. I have always been grateful for that, but it just solidified in my mind the importance of planning for as many contingencies as possible.
We didn't have any problems finding something for Boogie. We were broke and really would only get to look at all the cute baby clothes. When we ran across something that was so cute that we were willing to forgo a meal for, it came home with us as his going home outfit. It's a cuddly yellow and white almost corduroy feeling material with 2 embroidered ducks on it. I must say I still think it is utterly adorable.
We had more difficulty with Will. Really that makes sense since we were out to find something that would challenge Boogie's outfit for ultimate cuteness. Eventually we found the cutest little bunny outfit of pale blue for our little Easter time baby. It is so soft and snugly. Again, I still LOVE it!
I should have realized that this time around would be even more difficult. Now everything I look at is competing with two other outfits! And, of course, it needs to be completely different from the other outfits! So for months now we have been looking all over the place for something amazing. We checked Carter's, Osh Kosh, Children's Place, Janie and Jack, Crazy 8's, etc. We checked each store numerous times constantly waiting for the stock to change. No luck.
Just when I thought that I would have to settle something amazing happened... we found something cute. It's cotton so it's not as fancy as the other outfits have been but what it lacks in fancy it makes up for in sweet. It is white with blue and gray, with elephants on it to represent the little chunker on the way. And it says, "Mommy loves me" which is so very true. It's simple but, with everything else we've had thrown at us lately, simple seems perfect.
Yep, choosing an outfit for my newest baby to go home in has been quite a challenge. I am willing to reuse most anything from one baby to the next but the going home outfit is the exception. I feel like each baby deserves to face the big, bad world for the first time in something chosen just for them! It has always been a big deal to me, ever since I didn't get to choose my daughter's going home outfit. Her birth was early and far from home and so I didn't have anything with me. Luckily, my Aunt Connie had made the hellish drive down just to be there for us and she went shopping for me. I have always been grateful for that, but it just solidified in my mind the importance of planning for as many contingencies as possible.
We didn't have any problems finding something for Boogie. We were broke and really would only get to look at all the cute baby clothes. When we ran across something that was so cute that we were willing to forgo a meal for, it came home with us as his going home outfit. It's a cuddly yellow and white almost corduroy feeling material with 2 embroidered ducks on it. I must say I still think it is utterly adorable.
We had more difficulty with Will. Really that makes sense since we were out to find something that would challenge Boogie's outfit for ultimate cuteness. Eventually we found the cutest little bunny outfit of pale blue for our little Easter time baby. It is so soft and snugly. Again, I still LOVE it!
I should have realized that this time around would be even more difficult. Now everything I look at is competing with two other outfits! And, of course, it needs to be completely different from the other outfits! So for months now we have been looking all over the place for something amazing. We checked Carter's, Osh Kosh, Children's Place, Janie and Jack, Crazy 8's, etc. We checked each store numerous times constantly waiting for the stock to change. No luck.
Just when I thought that I would have to settle something amazing happened... we found something cute. It's cotton so it's not as fancy as the other outfits have been but what it lacks in fancy it makes up for in sweet. It is white with blue and gray, with elephants on it to represent the little chunker on the way. And it says, "Mommy loves me" which is so very true. It's simple but, with everything else we've had thrown at us lately, simple seems perfect.
Friday, October 12, 2012
Playing Kissyface
I love so many of the phases children go through. I love when newborns grasp tightly to a finger just out of reflex. I love when babies first learn a word and they just babble it over and over. I love the shocked look when a toddler first accomplishes a new feat. I could go on and on listing off the amazing phases children go through but I have to just pause on the phase that Willkins is currently in. Perhaps it is because it is his current phase but, at least for right now, this is my FAVORITE phase!
He's in the kissy phase! He kisses me whenever he walks past me. He wrestles Boogie to the floor, grabs his head and just kisses and kisses him all over his head. He runs up to the cats, wraps his arms around them and kisses them. He grabs each little stuffed animal, hugs it and kisses it before moving on to the next. Sometimes he just crawls up in my lap and begins kissing me. He'll kiss my knees, my shoulders, my cheeks and just anywhere that he can.
I love having him express his affection so freely. It is so sweet and amazing. I know that he won't be in this lovely phase for as long as I would love him to be. That would be impossible! But at least I can enjoy it for now! :)
He's in the kissy phase! He kisses me whenever he walks past me. He wrestles Boogie to the floor, grabs his head and just kisses and kisses him all over his head. He runs up to the cats, wraps his arms around them and kisses them. He grabs each little stuffed animal, hugs it and kisses it before moving on to the next. Sometimes he just crawls up in my lap and begins kissing me. He'll kiss my knees, my shoulders, my cheeks and just anywhere that he can.
I love having him express his affection so freely. It is so sweet and amazing. I know that he won't be in this lovely phase for as long as I would love him to be. That would be impossible! But at least I can enjoy it for now! :)
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Another baby, another name
Ahhh, a third little boy is on the way. You know how I stressed over finding the perfect name for Will. I just didn't know what to name him for quite some time. It was such a relief to come to a decision. This time the name for our little boy just fell into our laps, the same way he has just fallen into our laps.
I started out just as stressed out as before. What, oh, what could I name a THIRD little boy!?! Ack! As we sat in the doctor's office trying to figure out just what our options were I was bewildered. When the doctor came in to tell me how wonderfully healthy my little boy seemed to be I made a joke. "We could always name the baby Brad after the doctor." The doctor's head immediately came up, he smiled the biggest smile and got so excited about even the possibility. Apparently, in all the years he's been a doctor he has never delivered a Brad. I meant it as a joke but for the first time I had someone react the way I always expected people to react to having a child named after them, with excitement and a sense of being honored. When we walked out Hubby and I chatted about Brad as an option.
The rule has always been family names OR the names of people who are important to us. The question became, "Is our doctor important to us?" We considered that for a while. He is the man we trust with my life on the operating table. That's pretty important. He is also the person who held my hand when he saw how nervous the anesthesiologist made me. (Come on people, he was sticking a needle in my spine- don't miss, don't miss!) More than that, when my gall bladder gave out and I was laying in a hospital bed wondering why an internalist would not come see me, my OB is the person who recognized my husband and children in an elevator well enough to find out what was going on and light a fire under the hospital's behind to get me seen. He even called and checked on me. How many people can say that about their doctor? He not only remembered my name but my hubby's and my kids. He cared enough to make sure we were being taken care of. In short, he cares. So yes, he is of qualifying importance!
I said to Hubby, "He reacted the way I have always wanted someone to react, he has been awesome to us and has so many qualities that I would want in my son AND I think I really kind of like the name Brad. It's strong and sweet at the same time." Hubby just smiled. He agreed to Brad as one of the baby's names but said we had to find a second name that could apply to both our families.
I immediately hit the ancestry.com account. I looked and looked. I traced my family back to the Mayflower. Hubby's mother already had his family traced back just as far. The list of common names was very, very small. To be exact, there were three. We didn't know what to do. There was only one name that was common to both our families where we knew anything about the men who had the name. We decided to give it some time and it would come to us. And then our hearts broke.
One afternoon, when I was taking a nap, I was awoken by Hubby's mere presence in the room. He was so upset by what was being said to him on the phone that his demeanor woke me up. Once he saw my eyes he simply said, "Uncle Mike died." I could see the shock in his eyes but even I was more shocked than I know how to describe. Over the next few days I did what I could to help Justin through his grief but the quandary of the baby's name never left my mind.
You see, Michael is one of the three names our families share. In fact it is the one name where we can both describe the Michael's in our family. Actually, we can both describe each other's Michael's for that matter. Justin's Uncle Mike was big. In everything he was big. He was tall and broad. His voice filled the entire house without even trying. His good humor filled everyone around him. He lived life in a big way. He loved his family in a big way. I wish I was a more eloquent wordsmith so I could explain just how important he was to the entire family. I find myself lacking though and can only ask that everyone believe me when I say that he was wonderful. And with each passing hour I thought of how Uncle Mike would have loved having a little namesake.
The only problem- I was too frightened of sending Hubby over the edge of grief to mention it to him. I waited and waited for Hubby to mention it. I dropped little hints. Nothing. Eventually I even asked his mother and sister what they thought. Still I hadn't mentioned it to Hubby. When I finally mentioned it to Hubby he jumped at the idea like he had been subconsciously waiting for me to say it out loud. He loved the idea.
The next evening we spoke to Hubby's aunt about it. With her blessing we finally had a name for our newest addition and once again we KNOW that we have chosen amazing men for our son to model himself after. And I know that our baby will have the biggest guardian angel in the heavens watching over him. So it is with pleasure that I officially announce to everyone that our new baby will be named
I started out just as stressed out as before. What, oh, what could I name a THIRD little boy!?! Ack! As we sat in the doctor's office trying to figure out just what our options were I was bewildered. When the doctor came in to tell me how wonderfully healthy my little boy seemed to be I made a joke. "We could always name the baby Brad after the doctor." The doctor's head immediately came up, he smiled the biggest smile and got so excited about even the possibility. Apparently, in all the years he's been a doctor he has never delivered a Brad. I meant it as a joke but for the first time I had someone react the way I always expected people to react to having a child named after them, with excitement and a sense of being honored. When we walked out Hubby and I chatted about Brad as an option.
The rule has always been family names OR the names of people who are important to us. The question became, "Is our doctor important to us?" We considered that for a while. He is the man we trust with my life on the operating table. That's pretty important. He is also the person who held my hand when he saw how nervous the anesthesiologist made me. (Come on people, he was sticking a needle in my spine- don't miss, don't miss!) More than that, when my gall bladder gave out and I was laying in a hospital bed wondering why an internalist would not come see me, my OB is the person who recognized my husband and children in an elevator well enough to find out what was going on and light a fire under the hospital's behind to get me seen. He even called and checked on me. How many people can say that about their doctor? He not only remembered my name but my hubby's and my kids. He cared enough to make sure we were being taken care of. In short, he cares. So yes, he is of qualifying importance!
I said to Hubby, "He reacted the way I have always wanted someone to react, he has been awesome to us and has so many qualities that I would want in my son AND I think I really kind of like the name Brad. It's strong and sweet at the same time." Hubby just smiled. He agreed to Brad as one of the baby's names but said we had to find a second name that could apply to both our families.
I immediately hit the ancestry.com account. I looked and looked. I traced my family back to the Mayflower. Hubby's mother already had his family traced back just as far. The list of common names was very, very small. To be exact, there were three. We didn't know what to do. There was only one name that was common to both our families where we knew anything about the men who had the name. We decided to give it some time and it would come to us. And then our hearts broke.
One afternoon, when I was taking a nap, I was awoken by Hubby's mere presence in the room. He was so upset by what was being said to him on the phone that his demeanor woke me up. Once he saw my eyes he simply said, "Uncle Mike died." I could see the shock in his eyes but even I was more shocked than I know how to describe. Over the next few days I did what I could to help Justin through his grief but the quandary of the baby's name never left my mind.
You see, Michael is one of the three names our families share. In fact it is the one name where we can both describe the Michael's in our family. Actually, we can both describe each other's Michael's for that matter. Justin's Uncle Mike was big. In everything he was big. He was tall and broad. His voice filled the entire house without even trying. His good humor filled everyone around him. He lived life in a big way. He loved his family in a big way. I wish I was a more eloquent wordsmith so I could explain just how important he was to the entire family. I find myself lacking though and can only ask that everyone believe me when I say that he was wonderful. And with each passing hour I thought of how Uncle Mike would have loved having a little namesake.
The only problem- I was too frightened of sending Hubby over the edge of grief to mention it to him. I waited and waited for Hubby to mention it. I dropped little hints. Nothing. Eventually I even asked his mother and sister what they thought. Still I hadn't mentioned it to Hubby. When I finally mentioned it to Hubby he jumped at the idea like he had been subconsciously waiting for me to say it out loud. He loved the idea.
The next evening we spoke to Hubby's aunt about it. With her blessing we finally had a name for our newest addition and once again we KNOW that we have chosen amazing men for our son to model himself after. And I know that our baby will have the biggest guardian angel in the heavens watching over him. So it is with pleasure that I officially announce to everyone that our new baby will be named
Bradley Michael!
Saturday, August 25, 2012
Boog's rules on being a good big brother
When we first told Boogie about the newest addition growing in my belly we asked him what his advice would be to Will on being a great big brother. What he said was odd and quirky. It was very Boogie. He hasn't stopped the odd and quirky thing either. Just yesterday we had a giggle worthy discussion. (-Mom, how far is a mile? -umm, 5,280 feet I think -Wow, that's far -yep -So 300 miles would be... really, really far) This morning I overheard him exclaim, "Oh, I just had a heartburn." because he realized he left the baby gate open when he walked through and Will was about to sneak out. So, when I asked him to give Will lessons on being a good big brother I expected hilarity. He rose to the occasion, but not I way I expected.
The 3 things you have to do to be a good big brother! (Go ahead and read these with a very authoritarian air!)
1) Love
2) Play
3) Help
To show love you have to share your toys and give hugs and kisses.
To play with a baby you have to play A LOT, and use no small toys or bags. Those aren't safe for babies.
To help you have to hold the baby's hand so they are happy, sing to them when they are upset and remember to talk softly so you don't upset them. Babies like that stuff.
Often I worry that everything I say to Boogie goes in one ear and out the other but today he showed me that some things have sunk in. He may sometimes forget which planet rotates "backwards" or all the words that are pronouns but he remembers how to love. What more should I ask for?
The 3 things you have to do to be a good big brother! (Go ahead and read these with a very authoritarian air!)
1) Love
2) Play
3) Help
To show love you have to share your toys and give hugs and kisses.
To play with a baby you have to play A LOT, and use no small toys or bags. Those aren't safe for babies.
To help you have to hold the baby's hand so they are happy, sing to them when they are upset and remember to talk softly so you don't upset them. Babies like that stuff.
Often I worry that everything I say to Boogie goes in one ear and out the other but today he showed me that some things have sunk in. He may sometimes forget which planet rotates "backwards" or all the words that are pronouns but he remembers how to love. What more should I ask for?
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
A Will bit of cuteness
Just a quick story to make everyone giggle...
The other day Will tried to run past me. When he got to me I leaned out and gave him little kiss. He immediately stopped running and started crying! I said, "Are you that sad that I stole a kiss?" He shook his head yes and popped his bottom lip ever further out than before. I said, "Do you want me to kiss it and make it all better?" He smiled, shook his head yes, accepted my kiss and went merrily on his way. Ahhh, the logic of a little guy!
The other day Will tried to run past me. When he got to me I leaned out and gave him little kiss. He immediately stopped running and started crying! I said, "Are you that sad that I stole a kiss?" He shook his head yes and popped his bottom lip ever further out than before. I said, "Do you want me to kiss it and make it all better?" He smiled, shook his head yes, accepted my kiss and went merrily on his way. Ahhh, the logic of a little guy!
Saturday, June 30, 2012
And the baby is a...
A few days ago I wrote all about the issue they found during my ultrasound. Do you know what I didn't mention? We know the baby's gender!
During that first ultrasound the tech took a guess. I say she took a guess because the little trouble maker was in the fetal position. Seriously, the baby's feet were tucked right under that little bottom. There was no way to really know for sure. She did, however, shake my belly a bunch. She was trying to get the baby to wake up and move. It didn't work, but it did give her something. When she shook my belly something would flop for a second. That happened maybe 5 times!
When I went in for my first follow up ultrasound (I have another one in just over a week) we got the classic look. This time the baby was definitely cooperating. After that ultrasound there is no doubt! This baby is a boy! :)
During that first ultrasound the tech took a guess. I say she took a guess because the little trouble maker was in the fetal position. Seriously, the baby's feet were tucked right under that little bottom. There was no way to really know for sure. She did, however, shake my belly a bunch. She was trying to get the baby to wake up and move. It didn't work, but it did give her something. When she shook my belly something would flop for a second. That happened maybe 5 times!
When I went in for my first follow up ultrasound (I have another one in just over a week) we got the classic look. This time the baby was definitely cooperating. After that ultrasound there is no doubt! This baby is a boy! :)
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Every pregnancy has it's own challenges
I have never hidden the fact that I am a c-section mom. In fact, I have never gone into labor with a full term baby. With my first child the c-section was required when she was 2 weeks premature because I had no amniotic fluid left and she was breach. Has she been able to wait that last two weeks perhaps she would have flipped around but because I was low on fluid there was no waiting allowed.
Each baby since has had it's own issues. With Boog my brain started to shut down other organs to keep supplying him with what he needed. With Will I had to be placed on medications to stop my stomache from emptying itself violently anytime I put anything in there. Each time I did research on everything, constantly searching for the answers and the solutions to each problem and hoping to understand. Do you know what I had never researched? The consequences of my low amniotic fluid with Kiddo.
At the time I had no way to research it. I had no internet access and, if we are all being honest, the amount of information readily available on the web in 1999 was very limited. In the years since there has always been the thought that it would do me no good to research and frighten myself about what could have happened. For 12 years I have lived in blissfull ignorance. That ignorance is no longer allowed.
Exactly two weeks ago I had my big ultrasound. We were so excited. My mother-in-law came up to watch the boys. Kiddo was here to actually experience it. The whole world seemed wonderful.
The tech was friendly and helpful. She showed us the babies heart, lungs, kidneys, liver, etc. She kept shaking my belly to try and get us better views of the little cuties face. She explained where my placenta is attached, right on the back which is perfect for a c-section mommy. She let us listen to the heartbeat. She never once acted as though there were anything to worry about.
We all happily went to wait for the doctor. We joked about possible baby names. We talked about dinner and sun burns. We had no cares or worries. When the doctor came in he was very calm. He told us how well the baby seemed to be developing. He talked about how everything with the baby is right on track. Then he nonchalantly mentioned that my amniotic fluid is low. He told me to get plenty of rest and drink tons of water. We all smiled and I promised to do just that. We left with no worries. It's just a little water, right?
That night I finally researched the causes and consequences of low amniotic fluid. I also tried to look into how to combat it but apparently, if it isn't caused by a dehydrated mommy, there really isn't anything to be done. What I did find scared me. The list of possible causes is pretty short. I could be dehydrated, I could have a tear in my amniotic sac, I could have placental abruption or the baby could have a blockage in the poor child's digestive system. The solution for dehydration is obvious and often a tear in the sac will repair itself. Otherwise, there is no fixing the issue. The consequences are even scarier. The baby uses the amniotic fluid to exercise the lungs and the digestive system. If there isn't enough then that can cause dire consequences for those two systems.
I immediately drank two bottles of water! Over the course of the weekend I drank an entire flat of water. Every second I was awake I had a drink in my hand. I never knew rehydrating could seem so much like work. I took my job to heart though.
The next Monday I had another ultrasound. I was expecting the doctor to tell me that my fluid was completely normal now or that things were horrible. I got something a little in the middle. My fluid had gone up by 1 cm. It is still about half of what it should be but at least it went up. The doctor has me continuing to rest as much as possible and I am under orders to drink, drink, drink. He is hopeful that when I go back in two and a half weeks my fluid will have continued to climb.
I have constant prayers going up that that is the case. I am doing my best to will that to be the case. All that said I have to agree with my cousin. "Is it too much to ask to have an easy pregnancy?"
Each baby since has had it's own issues. With Boog my brain started to shut down other organs to keep supplying him with what he needed. With Will I had to be placed on medications to stop my stomache from emptying itself violently anytime I put anything in there. Each time I did research on everything, constantly searching for the answers and the solutions to each problem and hoping to understand. Do you know what I had never researched? The consequences of my low amniotic fluid with Kiddo.
At the time I had no way to research it. I had no internet access and, if we are all being honest, the amount of information readily available on the web in 1999 was very limited. In the years since there has always been the thought that it would do me no good to research and frighten myself about what could have happened. For 12 years I have lived in blissfull ignorance. That ignorance is no longer allowed.
Exactly two weeks ago I had my big ultrasound. We were so excited. My mother-in-law came up to watch the boys. Kiddo was here to actually experience it. The whole world seemed wonderful.
The tech was friendly and helpful. She showed us the babies heart, lungs, kidneys, liver, etc. She kept shaking my belly to try and get us better views of the little cuties face. She explained where my placenta is attached, right on the back which is perfect for a c-section mommy. She let us listen to the heartbeat. She never once acted as though there were anything to worry about.
We all happily went to wait for the doctor. We joked about possible baby names. We talked about dinner and sun burns. We had no cares or worries. When the doctor came in he was very calm. He told us how well the baby seemed to be developing. He talked about how everything with the baby is right on track. Then he nonchalantly mentioned that my amniotic fluid is low. He told me to get plenty of rest and drink tons of water. We all smiled and I promised to do just that. We left with no worries. It's just a little water, right?
That night I finally researched the causes and consequences of low amniotic fluid. I also tried to look into how to combat it but apparently, if it isn't caused by a dehydrated mommy, there really isn't anything to be done. What I did find scared me. The list of possible causes is pretty short. I could be dehydrated, I could have a tear in my amniotic sac, I could have placental abruption or the baby could have a blockage in the poor child's digestive system. The solution for dehydration is obvious and often a tear in the sac will repair itself. Otherwise, there is no fixing the issue. The consequences are even scarier. The baby uses the amniotic fluid to exercise the lungs and the digestive system. If there isn't enough then that can cause dire consequences for those two systems.
I immediately drank two bottles of water! Over the course of the weekend I drank an entire flat of water. Every second I was awake I had a drink in my hand. I never knew rehydrating could seem so much like work. I took my job to heart though.
The next Monday I had another ultrasound. I was expecting the doctor to tell me that my fluid was completely normal now or that things were horrible. I got something a little in the middle. My fluid had gone up by 1 cm. It is still about half of what it should be but at least it went up. The doctor has me continuing to rest as much as possible and I am under orders to drink, drink, drink. He is hopeful that when I go back in two and a half weeks my fluid will have continued to climb.
I have constant prayers going up that that is the case. I am doing my best to will that to be the case. All that said I have to agree with my cousin. "Is it too much to ask to have an easy pregnancy?"
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
That jack-o-lantern smile!
Kiddo got her first tooth right when the books said she should. Boogie got his early, 2 months early. So imagine my surprise when the time babies usually get their first tooth came and went for little Willkins. I talked to the doctor about it. I talked to the dentist about it. I googled it. I was actually a little panicked about it, and very definitely sensitive about it. The doctor said, "no big deal." The dentist said, "It's super common." The wackjobs on google said he was brain dead. Umm yeah, OK.
At Will's one year check-up the doctor checked for any signs that his teeth were coming in. Nothing. The doctor still wasn't worried. He said give it until his 18 month checkup. That was on April 30th. Everyday I checked for signs of teeth. Nothing, nothing, nothing... Then, on May 28th, I woke up to 3 teeth poking through. Say what? One top front tooth actually protruded, the other top front tooth shined through and one bottom front tooth was a sharp little tack of a tooth corner pushed through! The very next day I checked and evidence of 6 teeth to come was there. We are still waiting for those other teeth to poke through, though I believe the other bottom front tooth has an edge protruding. But, now I wait patiently. For now I will enjoy an adorable little jack-o-lantern smile. And it is certainly adorable.
Leave it to Will to do things in his own way and time! :)
At Will's one year check-up the doctor checked for any signs that his teeth were coming in. Nothing. The doctor still wasn't worried. He said give it until his 18 month checkup. That was on April 30th. Everyday I checked for signs of teeth. Nothing, nothing, nothing... Then, on May 28th, I woke up to 3 teeth poking through. Say what? One top front tooth actually protruded, the other top front tooth shined through and one bottom front tooth was a sharp little tack of a tooth corner pushed through! The very next day I checked and evidence of 6 teeth to come was there. We are still waiting for those other teeth to poke through, though I believe the other bottom front tooth has an edge protruding. But, now I wait patiently. For now I will enjoy an adorable little jack-o-lantern smile. And it is certainly adorable.
Leave it to Will to do things in his own way and time! :)
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
Watermelon Baby
There are so many things that my children do daily that make me think to myself, "Please never forget this!" And then there are things that I know that if I ever forget them it will be because I have gone completely batty. One of those things occurred the other day when I discovered just how much Will loves watermelon.
When we were visiting my grandparents a few weeks ago he had watermelon for the first time and really seemed to love it. He ate it as his entire dinner twice in one week! And loved that he had that option. He just smiled and smiled at every piece placed in front of him. So, when we came home I knew that I should be sure to pick up a watermelon at the store.
Oh my, how his love of watermelon has grown! He started out eating more watermelon than even I ate, only possibly being equaled by his sister! Finally, he seemed to slow down. Surely he was done, we thought.
Then he wanted another piece. We handed him a piece and watched as he pulled at it until it was a hundred little pieces. Hubby wanted to call him done but somehow I knew he had a plan. "Just wait", I said. Carefully Will picked up each piece and pressed it between thumb and pointer finger. When all the juice was out then he would pop the piece in his mouth. He did that to every tiny piece. Hubby refused to let him have any more watermelon at that point. Will gave him the cute pouty face about it so Hubby escaped to the kitchen. As soon as Hubby was out of sight Will grinned at me. He scrunched himself down in his highchair, leaned forward and began to lap up the watermelon juice from his high chair tray with his tongue. He resembled a puppy on a very hot day. He slurped and lapped, lapped and slurped until he couldn't get any more with his mommy giggled and laughing all the while. The next morning he happily repeated the routine.
I have a feeling that if I made watermelon an option at every meal he would eat it at every meal. The whole house is in agreement that we are going to have to keep watermelon in the house as long as it is in season. And I am of the firm mindset that I have to keep that watermelon baby smile safely preserved in my memory!
When we were visiting my grandparents a few weeks ago he had watermelon for the first time and really seemed to love it. He ate it as his entire dinner twice in one week! And loved that he had that option. He just smiled and smiled at every piece placed in front of him. So, when we came home I knew that I should be sure to pick up a watermelon at the store.
Oh my, how his love of watermelon has grown! He started out eating more watermelon than even I ate, only possibly being equaled by his sister! Finally, he seemed to slow down. Surely he was done, we thought.
Then he wanted another piece. We handed him a piece and watched as he pulled at it until it was a hundred little pieces. Hubby wanted to call him done but somehow I knew he had a plan. "Just wait", I said. Carefully Will picked up each piece and pressed it between thumb and pointer finger. When all the juice was out then he would pop the piece in his mouth. He did that to every tiny piece. Hubby refused to let him have any more watermelon at that point. Will gave him the cute pouty face about it so Hubby escaped to the kitchen. As soon as Hubby was out of sight Will grinned at me. He scrunched himself down in his highchair, leaned forward and began to lap up the watermelon juice from his high chair tray with his tongue. He resembled a puppy on a very hot day. He slurped and lapped, lapped and slurped until he couldn't get any more with his mommy giggled and laughing all the while. The next morning he happily repeated the routine.
I have a feeling that if I made watermelon an option at every meal he would eat it at every meal. The whole house is in agreement that we are going to have to keep watermelon in the house as long as it is in season. And I am of the firm mindset that I have to keep that watermelon baby smile safely preserved in my memory!
Monday, May 21, 2012
Bragging on my babies!
This has been a very busy few weeks for us, in large part because my children just keep giving me things to cry proud tears over. I might be a bit biased but they really are amazing little people!
Kiddo
We took kiddo to a ATA competition about 6 weeks ago were she got first in combat sparring. I looked like a crazy woman whooping and cheering for her. Recently I checked the standings and it appears that she is going to get another state title this year. This one will be for... combat sparring.
Two weeks ago the boys and I spent the day traveling to Kiddo's National Junior Honor Society induction! Go Kiddo! More proud tears!
Last week Hubby took the day off of work and we all drove out for Kiddo's choir concert where she had her first ever solo! She did really well! :) The tears of pride just keep flowing!
Boogie
Boogie has been dancing for 3 years now. He loves dancing and I often hear that dancing is his life, so it should come as no surprise that his proud points have mostly revolves around dance.
The day that his dance studio moved was picture day and I couldn't help but melt at how cute he looked. I am really looking forward to seeing just how adorable the pictures are!
The next week was his dance recital. I think that I can safely say that he hit the nail on the head with both his dances. He was adorable and radiated happiness being on that stage! Then during curtain call he won an award from the studio for being the most dedicated dancer. And he definitely is a dedicated dancer! So proud of him!
In the midst of all that we found out that he has been invited to join the competition team for next year. It will be the first year of competition team and it is invitation only so it is so very exciting! I'll love getting to have more opportunities to watch him radiate on stage!
Willkins
My little Willkins has had a few milestones of his own.
Will started taking a few steps here and there a few months ago but in the last month he went from a few steps to walking all over the place. That baby can really move out. He walks sideways, backwards and can pivot around. He can walk then bend over and pick something up and take off again. He really pulled my heartstrings when I watched him learn how to walk with shoes on. He's just soooo cute!
Will has also started really conveying what he wants. He talks some and he also makes up his own little signs. It can be a funny game of charades but it is also wonderful to have a child who works to make you understand what he means instead of just yelling at his mommy!
The in utero hero
The latest/upcoming addition to the family is doing what babies do best- growing!
There is a strong little heartbeat. At my last appointment the nurse practitioner found the heartbeat immediately but couldn't keep up with the baby because it was swimming like Micheal Phelps. Hubby was listening to the heartbeat the other day and the baby moved. He tried to track it... the baby went from far left to far right like shabow!
I am utterly exhausted all the time which I choose to believe is the baby using my energy up to help grow. If that is all right this baby is growing faster than a race car drives!
Finally, about four nights ago I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep because this new little baby was tickling my belly for hours! It was amazing! Go baby!
Kiddo
We took kiddo to a ATA competition about 6 weeks ago were she got first in combat sparring. I looked like a crazy woman whooping and cheering for her. Recently I checked the standings and it appears that she is going to get another state title this year. This one will be for... combat sparring.
Two weeks ago the boys and I spent the day traveling to Kiddo's National Junior Honor Society induction! Go Kiddo! More proud tears!
Last week Hubby took the day off of work and we all drove out for Kiddo's choir concert where she had her first ever solo! She did really well! :) The tears of pride just keep flowing!
Boogie
Boogie has been dancing for 3 years now. He loves dancing and I often hear that dancing is his life, so it should come as no surprise that his proud points have mostly revolves around dance.
The day that his dance studio moved was picture day and I couldn't help but melt at how cute he looked. I am really looking forward to seeing just how adorable the pictures are!
The next week was his dance recital. I think that I can safely say that he hit the nail on the head with both his dances. He was adorable and radiated happiness being on that stage! Then during curtain call he won an award from the studio for being the most dedicated dancer. And he definitely is a dedicated dancer! So proud of him!
In the midst of all that we found out that he has been invited to join the competition team for next year. It will be the first year of competition team and it is invitation only so it is so very exciting! I'll love getting to have more opportunities to watch him radiate on stage!
Willkins
My little Willkins has had a few milestones of his own.
Will started taking a few steps here and there a few months ago but in the last month he went from a few steps to walking all over the place. That baby can really move out. He walks sideways, backwards and can pivot around. He can walk then bend over and pick something up and take off again. He really pulled my heartstrings when I watched him learn how to walk with shoes on. He's just soooo cute!
Will has also started really conveying what he wants. He talks some and he also makes up his own little signs. It can be a funny game of charades but it is also wonderful to have a child who works to make you understand what he means instead of just yelling at his mommy!
The in utero hero
The latest/upcoming addition to the family is doing what babies do best- growing!
There is a strong little heartbeat. At my last appointment the nurse practitioner found the heartbeat immediately but couldn't keep up with the baby because it was swimming like Micheal Phelps. Hubby was listening to the heartbeat the other day and the baby moved. He tried to track it... the baby went from far left to far right like shabow!
I am utterly exhausted all the time which I choose to believe is the baby using my energy up to help grow. If that is all right this baby is growing faster than a race car drives!
Finally, about four nights ago I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep because this new little baby was tickling my belly for hours! It was amazing! Go baby!
Thursday, May 3, 2012
After the wean
I have, over the past year, loosely chronicled my first time being a breastfeeding mom. And I told you a while ago that the doctor had instructed me to wean Will. Honestly, I thought my breastfeeding posts would end then. I was wrong, at least partly.
On Will's birthday he nursed for the last time. We had been gradually tapered down but I knew going from one to none would be a lot harder for us both than any of the other tapers. For his last feeding I turned off all distractions and just focused on him, on that last time of getting to provide for him what no one else could. It made me cry and somehow he seemed to understand because he drank for a long time that night. When he was done I convinced myself that in a week or two he would forget what he was missing.
I mean, he's a baby. Babies don't have long memories, right? So far I have been wrong. The other day Will was brought to me right after my shower. I hadn't yet gotten dressed but he was upset so I began to snuggle him. He calmed down, smiled at me and then began to slowly lean toward me like he wanted a hug. It was no hug that he was reaching for! He tried to latch on! Silly baby!
Last night Hubby had a horrible headache. Now, he has been responsible for taking care of Will at night for a few reasons. The first reason is that when we were weaning we needed him to be a buffer between Will and the milk. He would work to get Will back to sleep without milk. The second reason is that I am pregnant and, quite frankly, completely exhausted ALL THE TIME! The third being that it is already uncomfortable for me to put Will to bed. My baby belly makes my arms to short to reach his mattress!But, as I said, Hubby had a headache last night.
I decided I would take Will for the night and allow Hubby to get in some really good rest. He desperately needed a full night's sleep. Oh my- Will has not forgotten those night time feedings. As I tried to cuddle him to sleep Will just kept trying to rip my nightgown off. He hit me in the face when he couldn't gain access to his favorite feeding trough. Finally he latched on to the soft skin on the inside of my elbow and went to sleep. All I could think was oh my! When he awoke after some rest he did the exact same sequence again.
I just keep wondering when he will stop wanting to nurse. I really didn't expect him to still crave it after weeks of it being gone. Perhaps I am the silly one and that is completely common. I don't know. But as much as it saddens me to not be able to provide that for him I also revel in the thought that he really loved being a breastfed baby. OK, so maybe I am definitely a silly mommy!
On Will's birthday he nursed for the last time. We had been gradually tapered down but I knew going from one to none would be a lot harder for us both than any of the other tapers. For his last feeding I turned off all distractions and just focused on him, on that last time of getting to provide for him what no one else could. It made me cry and somehow he seemed to understand because he drank for a long time that night. When he was done I convinced myself that in a week or two he would forget what he was missing.
I mean, he's a baby. Babies don't have long memories, right? So far I have been wrong. The other day Will was brought to me right after my shower. I hadn't yet gotten dressed but he was upset so I began to snuggle him. He calmed down, smiled at me and then began to slowly lean toward me like he wanted a hug. It was no hug that he was reaching for! He tried to latch on! Silly baby!
Last night Hubby had a horrible headache. Now, he has been responsible for taking care of Will at night for a few reasons. The first reason is that when we were weaning we needed him to be a buffer between Will and the milk. He would work to get Will back to sleep without milk. The second reason is that I am pregnant and, quite frankly, completely exhausted ALL THE TIME! The third being that it is already uncomfortable for me to put Will to bed. My baby belly makes my arms to short to reach his mattress!But, as I said, Hubby had a headache last night.
I decided I would take Will for the night and allow Hubby to get in some really good rest. He desperately needed a full night's sleep. Oh my- Will has not forgotten those night time feedings. As I tried to cuddle him to sleep Will just kept trying to rip my nightgown off. He hit me in the face when he couldn't gain access to his favorite feeding trough. Finally he latched on to the soft skin on the inside of my elbow and went to sleep. All I could think was oh my! When he awoke after some rest he did the exact same sequence again.
I just keep wondering when he will stop wanting to nurse. I really didn't expect him to still crave it after weeks of it being gone. Perhaps I am the silly one and that is completely common. I don't know. But as much as it saddens me to not be able to provide that for him I also revel in the thought that he really loved being a breastfed baby. OK, so maybe I am definitely a silly mommy!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Going with Barefeet
This weekend my whole family helped to move a dance studio, the studio that my Boog has attended for almost 3 years now. I honestly thought that there wouldn't be much to moving a studio where there had to be wide open spaces for dance. I was wrong. While there was a lot of work involved there was also a lot of emotion involved.
I felt it, the kids felt it and it was written all over the owner's face. There was as much sadness as excitement. It was sad to think of this chapter of things ending, of the new chapter to come. It almost felt like a graduation. BUT, it was amazing to know that we all felt that because Barefeet studio isn't just a dance studio for us, it is an extended family. The teachers don't just teach, they love the kids they teach. And the kids love them.
And that's why we do what we can to help. That's why we drive 40 minutes to the studio. And that's why we will be moving to the new studio with them. Cause we're all going with barefeet! :)
I felt it, the kids felt it and it was written all over the owner's face. There was as much sadness as excitement. It was sad to think of this chapter of things ending, of the new chapter to come. It almost felt like a graduation. BUT, it was amazing to know that we all felt that because Barefeet studio isn't just a dance studio for us, it is an extended family. The teachers don't just teach, they love the kids they teach. And the kids love them.
And that's why we do what we can to help. That's why we drive 40 minutes to the studio. And that's why we will be moving to the new studio with them. Cause we're all going with barefeet! :)
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
A year in his life
Before I start describing Will's first birthday I want to point out that I haven't posted in so long because I didn't want to push that last post off the top of the page. Until the man that killed Cory is arrested I want that post to be the first thing that people see if they stumble upon my page. So, that post has been postdated by a year. I hope and pray I will be able to change the date back to the original before then as it won't be needed once the arrest is made. That said- on to happy thoughts.
Will is a year old! No, seriously! Will is a year old! I can't believe it. After he was born I found myself staring at him and thinking how I couldn't believe that this sweet little boy was mine. Now those thoughts have morphed into my not being able to believe that I have been blessed with such a wonderful little guy for an entire year! It is just so incredible!
In celebration of that incredible little boy we did the best we could to give him fun little experiences. For his actual birthday my cousin and her little boy were visiting. We all went to the Rainforest Cafe for a little celebration. He LOVED the animatronics and the guy dressed up like a frog.... and the volcano! That was definitely something yummy in his tummy!
The following weekend we had his party. I let him pick his theme (as much as a one year old can pick a theme) of baby Mickey. Personally I think it was amazingly cute! There were little Mickey's and cupcakes everywhere. Funny little dude that Will is, he fell asleep as soon as his dinner was set in front of him though! It was OK since it gave us all time to visit. When he woke up I gave him his birthday cupcake and he definitely didn't fall asleep with that cupcake in his hand! He loved all his presents and has been enjoying them every day. In all, he had a great birthday and party! :)
Will is a year old! No, seriously! Will is a year old! I can't believe it. After he was born I found myself staring at him and thinking how I couldn't believe that this sweet little boy was mine. Now those thoughts have morphed into my not being able to believe that I have been blessed with such a wonderful little guy for an entire year! It is just so incredible!
In celebration of that incredible little boy we did the best we could to give him fun little experiences. For his actual birthday my cousin and her little boy were visiting. We all went to the Rainforest Cafe for a little celebration. He LOVED the animatronics and the guy dressed up like a frog.... and the volcano! That was definitely something yummy in his tummy!
The following weekend we had his party. I let him pick his theme (as much as a one year old can pick a theme) of baby Mickey. Personally I think it was amazingly cute! There were little Mickey's and cupcakes everywhere. Funny little dude that Will is, he fell asleep as soon as his dinner was set in front of him though! It was OK since it gave us all time to visit. When he woke up I gave him his birthday cupcake and he definitely didn't fall asleep with that cupcake in his hand! He loved all his presents and has been enjoying them every day. In all, he had a great birthday and party! :)
Friday, March 30, 2012
A call for justice in the murder of a child
On August 20, 2009 my friend Molly gave birth to a little boy. On September 8, 2010 she said goodbye to him. After days of watching her little bug suffer through a stroke and major brain damage her son, Cory Francis Sechtin, left her life. He was barely a year old. As my little boy approaches a year old I look at him and think of Molly and Cory.
I think of how Molly must have felt when she got the phone call that Cory was injured. I think of those days that she spent by his side wanting what could only be considered a miracle. I think of all the things that she will miss with him because he is gone. She will never see him run or hit a baseball. She will never get to hold his hand (or be told not to hold his hand) on the way to his first day of school. She will never find out if he is a dunker or a twister of Oreos. She will never have the opportunity to love or hate his first girlfriend. She will never cheer him on at a ball game or a concert. She will never help him with his homework. She will miss kindergarten, middle school, high school and college graduations. She will never know what kind of big brother he would be. She will never have grand kids that look exactly him. She will never embarrass him by taking 6 million pictures of him with his prom date. She will never teach him to ride a bike or a skateboard. She will never hear him sing or say, "I love you so much Mom!" She will miss so many large moments and a million little moments. She has been robbed of her little boy.
There is only moment left for her to have with Cory. That moment is the arrest of his murderer. Yes, I said murderer. There have more days since Cory's death than Cory had in life. What a sad thought. Molly has had to wait 18 months for the prosecutor to hold Cory's murderer responsible. She has waited over a year for the world to hear about how the husband of her child's daycare provider/babysitter shook her baby to death.
I am amazed that no one has taken note of Cory's life, and death. Where are the million binky marches for Cory? Where are the groups putting up pictures of Cory's killer and demanding justice? Where are the phone calls to the prosecutors office demanding he open the case file and get things moving? Where are the celebrities and sports teams crying out for Cory?
Well, I am crying out for Cory and for Molly. Won't you join me? You can start by clicking here and liking her page. From there Molly will keep you updated on the status of the case and what you can do to help demand justice for a little boy whose future was stolen from him.
*Edit* At the same time that I was writing this post another friend of Molly's wrote up a petition on Change.org to go to the office of the prosecutor responsible for the delay in prosecution. If you would like to go straight to the petition from here click here. Thanks!
I think of how Molly must have felt when she got the phone call that Cory was injured. I think of those days that she spent by his side wanting what could only be considered a miracle. I think of all the things that she will miss with him because he is gone. She will never see him run or hit a baseball. She will never get to hold his hand (or be told not to hold his hand) on the way to his first day of school. She will never find out if he is a dunker or a twister of Oreos. She will never have the opportunity to love or hate his first girlfriend. She will never cheer him on at a ball game or a concert. She will never help him with his homework. She will miss kindergarten, middle school, high school and college graduations. She will never know what kind of big brother he would be. She will never have grand kids that look exactly him. She will never embarrass him by taking 6 million pictures of him with his prom date. She will never teach him to ride a bike or a skateboard. She will never hear him sing or say, "I love you so much Mom!" She will miss so many large moments and a million little moments. She has been robbed of her little boy.
There is only moment left for her to have with Cory. That moment is the arrest of his murderer. Yes, I said murderer. There have more days since Cory's death than Cory had in life. What a sad thought. Molly has had to wait 18 months for the prosecutor to hold Cory's murderer responsible. She has waited over a year for the world to hear about how the husband of her child's daycare provider/babysitter shook her baby to death.
I am amazed that no one has taken note of Cory's life, and death. Where are the million binky marches for Cory? Where are the groups putting up pictures of Cory's killer and demanding justice? Where are the phone calls to the prosecutors office demanding he open the case file and get things moving? Where are the celebrities and sports teams crying out for Cory?
Well, I am crying out for Cory and for Molly. Won't you join me? You can start by clicking here and liking her page. From there Molly will keep you updated on the status of the case and what you can do to help demand justice for a little boy whose future was stolen from him.
*Edit* At the same time that I was writing this post another friend of Molly's wrote up a petition on Change.org to go to the office of the prosecutor responsible for the delay in prosecution. If you would like to go straight to the petition from here click here. Thanks!
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Now it's time to say goodbye...
to breastfeeding the baby :(
A few weeks ago I had my first prenatal appointment for the new baby. Everything went great. They did an ultrasound so we got the baby's first picture. Everything seems to be progressing nicely. The doctor did make my due date October 30 because the baby measured in at only 7 weeks gestational but other than that little shocker things went almost exactly as we expected. I should add about the date change that the doctor said that is entirely normal for breastfeeding mommas of young kids. Since that makes menstruation and ovulation sporadic sometimes counting from the last normal period doesn't work so great.
And then he told me to wean. He said that he doesn't want the breastfeeding to cause uterine contractions once I am in to my second trimester. By the time he sees me again Will needs to be completely weaned. Now, Will was 11 months at the time. Honestly, we were coming up to the time when I was considering weaning anyway. At his 9 month check up his pediatrician said he could start drinking cow's milk when I was ready to give it to him. And, considering I have never before been able to breastfeed one of my babies, I am pleased as punch that I had this experience with him. BUT somehow I am still sad to think of forcing him to stop. I expected him to say, "No thanks Mom, I think I'll have an apple juice instead."
That has yet to happen. I am diligently cutting down on the breast milk availability. He is down to twice a day. He can have it once during the day and once near bedtime. He doesn't nurse himself to sleep but he does fill up on it a little before he gets ready for bed to help him sleep well. And every time I give him access to them he looks like he just found his lost best friend. It is so sweet and bittersweet. I love how happy something I alone can do for him makes him but I hate that soon that will be gone for him. Soon his daytime feeding will go away. And then his night feeding.
I feel so blessed to be pregnant again. And I am going to do, as always, everything I can to keep this little one inside me growing and developing well. This time it just kind of makes me sad as well. But hey, maybe for a few months my boobs will belong to me again!
A few weeks ago I had my first prenatal appointment for the new baby. Everything went great. They did an ultrasound so we got the baby's first picture. Everything seems to be progressing nicely. The doctor did make my due date October 30 because the baby measured in at only 7 weeks gestational but other than that little shocker things went almost exactly as we expected. I should add about the date change that the doctor said that is entirely normal for breastfeeding mommas of young kids. Since that makes menstruation and ovulation sporadic sometimes counting from the last normal period doesn't work so great.
And then he told me to wean. He said that he doesn't want the breastfeeding to cause uterine contractions once I am in to my second trimester. By the time he sees me again Will needs to be completely weaned. Now, Will was 11 months at the time. Honestly, we were coming up to the time when I was considering weaning anyway. At his 9 month check up his pediatrician said he could start drinking cow's milk when I was ready to give it to him. And, considering I have never before been able to breastfeed one of my babies, I am pleased as punch that I had this experience with him. BUT somehow I am still sad to think of forcing him to stop. I expected him to say, "No thanks Mom, I think I'll have an apple juice instead."
That has yet to happen. I am diligently cutting down on the breast milk availability. He is down to twice a day. He can have it once during the day and once near bedtime. He doesn't nurse himself to sleep but he does fill up on it a little before he gets ready for bed to help him sleep well. And every time I give him access to them he looks like he just found his lost best friend. It is so sweet and bittersweet. I love how happy something I alone can do for him makes him but I hate that soon that will be gone for him. Soon his daytime feeding will go away. And then his night feeding.
I feel so blessed to be pregnant again. And I am going to do, as always, everything I can to keep this little one inside me growing and developing well. This time it just kind of makes me sad as well. But hey, maybe for a few months my boobs will belong to me again!
Friday, March 2, 2012
By the numbers
I don't know about anyone else but my brain often thinks in numbers and adding a new baby has really got me thinking numbers!
4: the number of kids I will have
6: the number of people in my family
5: the number of people my car holds
8: the number of months til my car is paid off
7: the number of months til the baby is due
4: the number of bedrooms in my house
4: the number of people that can sit at my kitchen table
2: the number of chairs I could add to my dining room table
9: the number of months old Will was when I got pregnant with the new baby
12 yrs, 7 yrs, 18 mos: the ages of my children when the new baby comes
3: the number of guys in my house (ahhh the testosterone)
65: the average number of hours a week that hubby works
5: the average number of hours of sleep I get at night
100: the approximate number of pictures I already have on display in my house
5: the number of years behind I am in my scrapbooking
Some of those are rather overwhelming until the second half of the thought enters my mind.
4: the number of kids I will have, and that makes me so happy!
6: the number of people in my family. Who would have thought an only child would get to have such a large family!
5: the number of people my car holds, but it's only an issue a few days a month and I have wanted a larger vehicle for a while anyway
8: the number of months til my car is paid off, and really, how fortuitous is that? It is so great that we are so close!
7: the number of months til the baby is due and most everything we would need to do is still one from Will!
4: the number of bedrooms in my house, but the idea of kids having their own rooms is a 21st century thought. Growing up with a roommate will really help the kids learn to deal with other people.
4: the number of people that can sit at my kitchen table but since hubby never gets to eat breakfast or lunch with us and kiddo is rarely here most of the time we'll be fine. And that will just encourage us to use the dining room!
2: the number of chairs I could add to my dining table, and that would be perfect! And maybe getting those chairs will mean I get to finish the dining room!
9: the number of months old Will was when I got pregnant with the new baby and it's nice to think how close they will be.
12 yrs, 7 yrs, 18 mos: how old my kids will be when the new baby is born. How amazing is that?
3: the number of guys in my house. And I have survived so surely I will survive if this baby is also a boy!
65: the average number of hours hubby works per week. It's hard to be upbeat with this one, but I guess at least he is employed?
5: the average number of hours of sleep I get per night. Usually I really don't mind that because Will is so cute when I go in to put hum back to sleep. Additionally, Justin and my body have both been trying to increase that number.
100: the approximate number of pictures I already have on display in my house. That's right- I have had that many cute pictures or great memories made.
5: the number of years behind I am in my scrapbooking, but that just means that for 5 years I have made more great memories than I have had down time to put on paper.
When I look at everything that way I have to add one more number.
0: the number of times I have wanted to change the timing of this baby.
4: the number of kids I will have
6: the number of people in my family
5: the number of people my car holds
8: the number of months til my car is paid off
7: the number of months til the baby is due
4: the number of bedrooms in my house
4: the number of people that can sit at my kitchen table
2: the number of chairs I could add to my dining room table
9: the number of months old Will was when I got pregnant with the new baby
12 yrs, 7 yrs, 18 mos: the ages of my children when the new baby comes
3: the number of guys in my house (ahhh the testosterone)
65: the average number of hours a week that hubby works
5: the average number of hours of sleep I get at night
100: the approximate number of pictures I already have on display in my house
5: the number of years behind I am in my scrapbooking
Some of those are rather overwhelming until the second half of the thought enters my mind.
4: the number of kids I will have, and that makes me so happy!
6: the number of people in my family. Who would have thought an only child would get to have such a large family!
5: the number of people my car holds, but it's only an issue a few days a month and I have wanted a larger vehicle for a while anyway
8: the number of months til my car is paid off, and really, how fortuitous is that? It is so great that we are so close!
7: the number of months til the baby is due and most everything we would need to do is still one from Will!
4: the number of bedrooms in my house, but the idea of kids having their own rooms is a 21st century thought. Growing up with a roommate will really help the kids learn to deal with other people.
4: the number of people that can sit at my kitchen table but since hubby never gets to eat breakfast or lunch with us and kiddo is rarely here most of the time we'll be fine. And that will just encourage us to use the dining room!
2: the number of chairs I could add to my dining table, and that would be perfect! And maybe getting those chairs will mean I get to finish the dining room!
9: the number of months old Will was when I got pregnant with the new baby and it's nice to think how close they will be.
12 yrs, 7 yrs, 18 mos: how old my kids will be when the new baby is born. How amazing is that?
3: the number of guys in my house. And I have survived so surely I will survive if this baby is also a boy!
65: the average number of hours hubby works per week. It's hard to be upbeat with this one, but I guess at least he is employed?
5: the average number of hours of sleep I get per night. Usually I really don't mind that because Will is so cute when I go in to put hum back to sleep. Additionally, Justin and my body have both been trying to increase that number.
100: the approximate number of pictures I already have on display in my house. That's right- I have had that many cute pictures or great memories made.
5: the number of years behind I am in my scrapbooking, but that just means that for 5 years I have made more great memories than I have had down time to put on paper.
When I look at everything that way I have to add one more number.
0: the number of times I have wanted to change the timing of this baby.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
A one scene announcement
Location: Outside Jim Oliver's Smokehouse on Monteagle Mountain
Time: Sunday afternoon
Me: Boogie, Gigi got to help you with your lessons to see how well you're doing, but she and PopPop don't know how well you are doing with ASL. Let's show them!
Boogie: Uh... OK
Me (signing): a
Boogie: a
Me: k
Boogie: k
Me: 11
Boogie: 11
Me: 55
Boogie: 55
Me: Dad
Boogie: Dad
Me: Girl
Boogie: Girl
Me: Mom
Boogie: Mom
Me: Pregnant
Boogie: Huh? I don't know that one.
Me (speaking): What do you think it is?
Boogie: Pregnany maybe?
Me: Right! Good job. Soooo... (signing again) Mom pregnant
Boogie: Mom pregnant
Me: Mom pregnant
Boogie (looking thoroughly confused): Mom Prgenant
Me (leaning in and whispering): Mom's pregnant!
Boogie: You're pregnant? (screaming) You're having a baby! I'm going to get those hundred babies I want! Yay!
So to make a short story even shorter: We are pregnant and very happy to be pregnant!
Time: Sunday afternoon
Me: Boogie, Gigi got to help you with your lessons to see how well you're doing, but she and PopPop don't know how well you are doing with ASL. Let's show them!
Boogie: Uh... OK
Me (signing): a
Boogie: a
Me: k
Boogie: k
Me: 11
Boogie: 11
Me: 55
Boogie: 55
Me: Dad
Boogie: Dad
Me: Girl
Boogie: Girl
Me: Mom
Boogie: Mom
Me: Pregnant
Boogie: Huh? I don't know that one.
Me (speaking): What do you think it is?
Boogie: Pregnany maybe?
Me: Right! Good job. Soooo... (signing again) Mom pregnant
Boogie: Mom pregnant
Me: Mom pregnant
Boogie (looking thoroughly confused): Mom Prgenant
Me (leaning in and whispering): Mom's pregnant!
Boogie: You're pregnant? (screaming) You're having a baby! I'm going to get those hundred babies I want! Yay!
So to make a short story even shorter: We are pregnant and very happy to be pregnant!
Monday, February 6, 2012
Sometimes I fail and win at once
I have a confession. I completely lost my patience today. Will was tired and rubbing his eyes. I kept trying to help him go to sleep. He just wouldn't sleep. There are days when he wants to be with Boogie so much that he will fight anything to be able to have even just one more minute with him. I thought that if I took Will to his room then I would be able to snuggle him or put him in his bed to rest. Apparently, out of sight is not out of mind! I, for the first time in his life, put him down to cry. After a few minutes I went back to rock him and cuddle him and help him reach the rest I could tell he needed. It worked. I felt a smile in my heart as I watched him begin to drift into sleep. In all the battle had lasted an hour. And then, in walked Boogie. Immediately Will was wide awake and clamoring for his big brother. Immediately all the time and work was for naught. And it frustrated me.
I sat Will with Boogie and told Boog that since he wouldn't just let me get Will to rest then Will could be his responsibility. I thought that Boog would experience Will's exhaustion and decide that maybe he doesn't have to come and "check" on me all the time. Instead Will was delighted to be with Boog and Boog was not at all put out! After a few minutes I reminded Boog that he still had more school work to do, more learning to accomplish. He was not phased in the least. Thirty seconds later I heard the very familiar sound of his voice. When I focused in I realized he was reading. He was reading to his baby brother, accomplishing both entertaining Will and practicing a skill.
The lesson I wanted to teach him failed miserably. I failed miserably at getting Will to sleep. And yet, my family won. My Boogie and my baby won. And that means I win too.
I sat Will with Boogie and told Boog that since he wouldn't just let me get Will to rest then Will could be his responsibility. I thought that Boog would experience Will's exhaustion and decide that maybe he doesn't have to come and "check" on me all the time. Instead Will was delighted to be with Boog and Boog was not at all put out! After a few minutes I reminded Boog that he still had more school work to do, more learning to accomplish. He was not phased in the least. Thirty seconds later I heard the very familiar sound of his voice. When I focused in I realized he was reading. He was reading to his baby brother, accomplishing both entertaining Will and practicing a skill.
The lesson I wanted to teach him failed miserably. I failed miserably at getting Will to sleep. And yet, my family won. My Boogie and my baby won. And that means I win too.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Rockin'
It is 2:15 am and I just finished putting Will back to bed. It was the second time he had gotten up tonight. I keep thinking that soon he will sleep through the night, but I also don't expect it. I know that by this time my other kids were sleeping through the night and I can't, for my life, remember how that happened. I have read all sorts of advice on how to get him to sleep longer but I just can't bring myself to attempt them.
The advice all seems to require me to allow him to cry it out some. Some recommend just letting him cry himself back to sleep, supposedly thereby making him teach himself to self soothe. Some recommend that I allow him to cry for a while so that gradually it will be longer between wake ups. I just can't do those. Every time I think maybe I will attempt it I think about my friend's little boy.
Two years ago a friend of mine adopted one of the world's sweetest children from the Ukraine. Children in orphanages in the Ukraine, and many other countries, don't get rocked to sleep. No one sings to them at night or reads them bedtime stories. There are no loving cuddles, tickles or kisses. Actually, those things are true all day long for those little angels. Consequently, when she first brought him home he would rock himself to sleep (or just to being calm) any time he was upset or when he needed to go to sleep. Can you imagine watching your child feel the need to curl up in a ball and rock themselves?
Now, Will gets lots of love. I hold him when he asks me and sometimes when he doesn't ask me too. I sing to him. I read to him. I play games and act a fool. He gets a million things that those children don't get. I don't for a minute think he will be as deprived as those children if, for one night, I let him "cry it out." I do, however, look at him and think that, at least for as long he is a baby, I don't want to give him even one reason to rock himself.
So, for now, I guess I will just keep getting up every few hours to be Will's personal record player and rocking chair with built in pillows.
The advice all seems to require me to allow him to cry it out some. Some recommend just letting him cry himself back to sleep, supposedly thereby making him teach himself to self soothe. Some recommend that I allow him to cry for a while so that gradually it will be longer between wake ups. I just can't do those. Every time I think maybe I will attempt it I think about my friend's little boy.
Two years ago a friend of mine adopted one of the world's sweetest children from the Ukraine. Children in orphanages in the Ukraine, and many other countries, don't get rocked to sleep. No one sings to them at night or reads them bedtime stories. There are no loving cuddles, tickles or kisses. Actually, those things are true all day long for those little angels. Consequently, when she first brought him home he would rock himself to sleep (or just to being calm) any time he was upset or when he needed to go to sleep. Can you imagine watching your child feel the need to curl up in a ball and rock themselves?
Now, Will gets lots of love. I hold him when he asks me and sometimes when he doesn't ask me too. I sing to him. I read to him. I play games and act a fool. He gets a million things that those children don't get. I don't for a minute think he will be as deprived as those children if, for one night, I let him "cry it out." I do, however, look at him and think that, at least for as long he is a baby, I don't want to give him even one reason to rock himself.
So, for now, I guess I will just keep getting up every few hours to be Will's personal record player and rocking chair with built in pillows.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Baker's Dozen
If you have come around my house at Christmastime then you know that I bake and bake and bake throughout the holiday season. This Christmas was no different. Actually, I even added a few things to my baking list. As I was baking I kept thinking, "My goodness. I am making a baker's dozen of types of things!" Little did I know how wrong I was. I actually made 19 different goodies. I made:
1. Crinkle Cookies
2. Dipped Pretzel Rods (decorated by Boog)
3. Candied Noodles
4. Dipped Ritz
5. Peanut Butter Cookies
6. Gingerbread Men
7. Toffee Cookies
8. Butterscotch and Chocolate Chip Cookies
9. Chocolate Mint Chip Cookies
10. Chocolate Peanut Butter Chip Cookies
11. Chocolate Fudge
12. Peanut Butter Fudge
13. Dipped Crinkle Cookies
14. Peanut Brittle
15. Mint Chocolate Bark
16. Painted Sugar Cookies
17. Candy Cane Cookies
18. Party Mix
19. Chocolate Covered Cherry Cookies
Over the course of this years baking I actually learned a few things. See, even an old dog can learn new tricks!
1. I ADORE parchment paper!
2. Publix parchment paper is better than name brand! The name brand would brown up quickly but the Publix parchment paper kept going and going!
3. You can use parchment paper when making peanut brittle. My whole life we have greased the pan so the peanut brittle would come out. On a whim I decided to try the parchment paper. Oh, how wonderfully it worked! And there wasn't any of the extra grease to deal with afterwards! Woot Woot!
4. Never try to just split an egg yolk for two different cookie paints. Just use two eggs, even if that means going to the store to buy another dozen!
5. Unbleached flour is wonderful. I always figured it would make my cookies darker than I like them to look. I was WRONG! Seriously, it made them beautiful and has the added benefit of being unbleached. I bought it by mistake because I was hurrying but I will always buy it in the future!
6. Nothing at all sticks to parchment paper. No seriously, all the things that I used to have to scrub forever just brushed off the parchment paper. It was glorious!
7. I always have to automatically make double batches of each cookie, otherwise there aren't any left from boys "testing" them.
8. Always use the Ulu to cut the fudge! Hubby says the fudge has never been easier to cut straight out of the fridge. He loved it, so I love it!
Overall, I used; 40 eggs,17 pounds of sugar, 12 pounds of flour, 10 bags of baking chips (6 different types!), 8 pounds of butter, 7 cans of milk, 6 boxes of cereal, 5 pounds of nuts, 4 jars of sprinkles, 3 bags of pretzels, 2 jars of cherries and an entire bottle of vanilla extract. That could almost be my own version of the 12 days of Christmas!
But Christmas is over now. The oven has gone back to cooking more dinners than desserts. My stove cooks more soups than candies now. At least for a while!
1. Crinkle Cookies
2. Dipped Pretzel Rods (decorated by Boog)
3. Candied Noodles
4. Dipped Ritz
5. Peanut Butter Cookies
6. Gingerbread Men
7. Toffee Cookies
8. Butterscotch and Chocolate Chip Cookies
9. Chocolate Mint Chip Cookies
10. Chocolate Peanut Butter Chip Cookies
11. Chocolate Fudge
12. Peanut Butter Fudge
13. Dipped Crinkle Cookies
14. Peanut Brittle
15. Mint Chocolate Bark
16. Painted Sugar Cookies
17. Candy Cane Cookies
18. Party Mix
19. Chocolate Covered Cherry Cookies
Over the course of this years baking I actually learned a few things. See, even an old dog can learn new tricks!
1. I ADORE parchment paper!
2. Publix parchment paper is better than name brand! The name brand would brown up quickly but the Publix parchment paper kept going and going!
3. You can use parchment paper when making peanut brittle. My whole life we have greased the pan so the peanut brittle would come out. On a whim I decided to try the parchment paper. Oh, how wonderfully it worked! And there wasn't any of the extra grease to deal with afterwards! Woot Woot!
4. Never try to just split an egg yolk for two different cookie paints. Just use two eggs, even if that means going to the store to buy another dozen!
5. Unbleached flour is wonderful. I always figured it would make my cookies darker than I like them to look. I was WRONG! Seriously, it made them beautiful and has the added benefit of being unbleached. I bought it by mistake because I was hurrying but I will always buy it in the future!
6. Nothing at all sticks to parchment paper. No seriously, all the things that I used to have to scrub forever just brushed off the parchment paper. It was glorious!
7. I always have to automatically make double batches of each cookie, otherwise there aren't any left from boys "testing" them.
8. Always use the Ulu to cut the fudge! Hubby says the fudge has never been easier to cut straight out of the fridge. He loved it, so I love it!
Overall, I used; 40 eggs,17 pounds of sugar, 12 pounds of flour, 10 bags of baking chips (6 different types!), 8 pounds of butter, 7 cans of milk, 6 boxes of cereal, 5 pounds of nuts, 4 jars of sprinkles, 3 bags of pretzels, 2 jars of cherries and an entire bottle of vanilla extract. That could almost be my own version of the 12 days of Christmas!
But Christmas is over now. The oven has gone back to cooking more dinners than desserts. My stove cooks more soups than candies now. At least for a while!
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