Roller Coasters

I love roller coasters. They are thrilling, extreme. One minute you are steadily climbing up a ramp, securely fastened in to your seat and the next minute you are diving, nay hurtling down through the air with you heart in your throat. Just when you can see the bottom your head gets thrown to one side or the other as the seemingly safe car jerks you around a wicked curve. You straighten up and prepare for the loops you can see coming up but don't realize there is an unexpected dip before you get to that loop and that dip makes you unprepared for the loop. Just when you have your bearings together and feel like you hope the crazy ride won't end, it ends. And then you have to wait in line for it to start all over again.

But what if I hated roller coasters? What if I were dragged along for each ride? What if the wait in line were filled with dread instead of excitement? What if I could never get used to the jerks and the dips and the loops? You often hear people compare a bad day to riding a roller coaster. For someone like me, someone who loves riding roller coasters, that doesn't make very much sense. But being a parent and a wife, boy have I figured it out. I no longer make the decision as to what ride I get on. I am drug along to whatever ride my loves have in store for me. They usually choose what my day will entail. Sometimes it is a great ride. Sometimes every minute just gets better and better. Sometimes it is a death spiral of a ride, a ride I don't want to go on. But I can't kick and scream. I can't demand they allow me off that ride. When they take me along the dips of bad attitude, the loops of whining and the jerks of anger, I have to just hold on tight and hope the next ride is better. Whenever I loose that wisp of hope, I, myself, cause some pretty nasty bits of track for my loved ones. And I hate doing that more than I hate those bad rides.

Now that I have beat that metaphor to death let me be blunt. All of this is foremost in my mind because today was one of those days I don't really want to repeat. It had it's good moments and it's bad moments... but most of all, it switched between the two with lightning speed. I think I may have a little emotional whiplash. And you know what? I really, really need to remember that tomorrow can be different from today. Hopefully, it will be. Hopefully, it will be one of those days where I worry no day can ever be so great again. Hopefully...